One Thousand Tiny Vacations

How I cope with circumstances rendering me unable to travel

 

I want to see the world as much as the next girl.

So far, I have visited a handful of other states but only a few major cities,

and only one other country: America’s next-door neighbor, Mexico.

Most of these experiences occurred between the year 2000 and 2013.

My husband got the chance to live all over the country growing up,

But as an adult has faced many financial challenges as well as 

vocational challenges, 

Which meant that he could take us on some small getaways 

within our home state of Florida,

 but there were no big-ticket adventures.

Even our honeymoon was here in Florida.

Since we have been parents, I have only been outside of Florida

A handful of times.

Most of them were for work-related training for the bank job I had

Up until I gave birth to our second child.

One was for my grandmother’s funeral and celebration of life.

The very last one before the beginning of the pandemic was 

A weekend in South Carolina visiting in-laws.

Then, for most of 2020, the whole world had to sit pretty in their homes.

The thing is, after everything opened back up,

We had two children and I had left my job, 

Which meant my husband had to work overtime at his at the time.

And then there was our third baby,

Born one year later at only 24 weeks.

This was followed by six months of back-and-forth every single day

Visiting the NICU.

Even if an all-expenses-paid resort getaway had been thrust at me,

I wouldn’t have taken it.

I wouldn’t have left my son in a lonely NICU room while I partied for days.

Once he was home, his many medical needs kept us all busy.

It also kept us all on high alert. 

He returned to the hospital three other times in two months

For breathing issues due to viruses.

It was not the time to talk about leaving town.

Also, before he was even home,

I was pregnant again.

I was sick and tired every day.

I had my hands full with three little ones,

And my pregnancy was being closely monitored 

With sometimes weekly doctor visits to prevent another premature birth.

It was definitely not the time to consider a week 

or even three days abroad.

After our fourth little miracle was born, 

We found out we would need to move soon.

We found a house and moved right away.

Now our rent is much higher, though our quality of life is much better.

Right after the holidays, my husband changed jobs.

There was more than a month in between them.

There has still been no leeway for a vacation fund.

In fact, there are times we are just scraping by.

In choosing a life with him and in choosing to have a family,

I forfeit the chance to travel.

At least for now.

 

And yet life goes on for everyone around me.

Friends get to go on road trips with their children.

Their spouses surprise them with an anniversary getaway.

They get to go on babymoons to nice resorts.

They get to fly in a plane to a mountain destination for skiing.

They go on business trips to big cities.

And I’m still here.

I’m that friend that can drop them off at the airport

or keep them updated on what’s going on at home,

what they missed at moms group.

Sometimes I’m fine with that.

Other times, I feel left out.

I feel like I’m missing some great adventure 

And life is passing me by.

 

When I feel so desperate for a reset or a little time away,

But I can’t get either of those things,

I must get creative.

In this post, I will share a dozen of the ways.

 

1.       Playing tourist in my own town

Not everyone will have this opportunity, but I live “in” vacation.

My Florida beach town is a destination for millions every year.

One thing that makes me feel like I had a brief change of pace

Is a day spent visiting some of the parts that people travel from across the world for, like the historic downtown streets that feel like 

I’m somewhere in Europe, sunny beaches, a historic lighthouse, and (when it can be afforded) local restaurants that bring a cultural experience to the table.

 

2.       Playing tourist with a tourist

Something that puts an even bigger spin on “brief change of pace” is when someone comes to visit from out of town. 

Taking them to see things, even ordinary things that I see all the time like certain parks or a coffee shop, can feel like a little escape as I look at things through their eyes for a moment.

 

3.       Playing tourist with a child

Having children did open up a whole new world of activities within the same town I was already living in. I had been aware of parks and playgrounds for years, but never had a reason to go to them.

I had heard about various indoor playgrounds or activity centers for children, but had never set foot in them until I had a toddler.

Other places I had been to before, but didn’t appreciate as much

until I had a chance to show them to my little ones and have them

get really excited, such as the small zoo we have here or the ice cream shop with the hand-dipped cones. 

 

4.       Five minute vacations

At least that’s what I call it. It’s when I have a little bit of free time, 

And instead of getting chores or errands done, I choose to do something 

That feels like I’m on vacation. In the past, I would drop off my firstborn at preschool and take my little second baby in his stroller and walk around the grounds of the local beach resort, sipping a latte that I purchased from their on-site Starbucks. Making this single small purchase “bought” permission to be on their grounds, sit on their luxurious patio chairs and wander across their private beach space. After my other two babies came along, I stopped doing this. However, I have not stopped doing other things like this. Some of my other little respites include:

-              Swimming at a friend’s neighborhood pool

-              Shave ice and a scenic drive along the bay front

-              A good iced coffee and a quiet drive while my kids 

are asleep in the car

-              Visiting a more upscale grocery store in a wealthier area

-              Taking a drive along scenic A1A instead of taking the interstate

-              Taking the children to nicer playgrounds in the next county over

-              Having a mini cultural experience, similar to dining at a local concept restaurant but in a smaller form like trying a Chinese boba drink or a taco from an authentic style Mexican street  taco truck

-              Looking at art in a free art gallery

-              Watching a thunderstorm from inside somewhere cozy

 

5.       Making a whole day of it

My third son, the one with the medical complexities due to prematurity,

Sometimes has follow up doctors appointments in the city, in a large medical facility by the river downtown. Most of the time, I go to the appointment and then make my way back home. Occasionally, I have made it part of a whole excursion. I especially did this when he was still in the NICU. After a few hours there, I would stop to do something fun on the way home to help work out the anxiety of having a NICU baby. Now when I make these trips downtown, I make them with a two year old and a little baby as well. I have stopped to take them and myself shopping at a couple of really nice secondhand stores near the city, have a salad bar lunch at Whole Foods or walk around the outdoor Town Center mall and window shop. I plan to one day visit the shopping district right near the hospital complexes on a day that’s neither too hot nor too cold, and I plan to take them to a children’s museum near there one day too.

 

6.       Getting a view

Sometimes just being elevated above it all feels like a getaway. Whenever I do take my son to his medical follow ups in the city, the view from those tower windows is fascinating to both me and my children. 

Prior to having to go to the city for him, I would go for fun sometimes and eat at a restaurant that was on top of a twelve story building. I liked to sit and eat my salad and look at the river. When I used to work, the Christmas party was at this restaurant one year. I also enjoy the view from the top of the lighthouse in our town, although there is no café up there nor any other type of seating. I haven’t been up in the lighthouse since before having our second baby, but I plan to go again soon when we have a sitter.

 

7.       Exploring my future options

Sometimes I think of a destination I would like to go to and I start exploring the logistics. What are the best hotels in the area? What is there to do for children there? What do the attractions cost? What is the best time of year to go and save money on lodging? How much is airfare or gas to drive there? 

Maybe I can’t put money down and book a trip right now, but I can save the travel plan in my computer and then give it to God as one of the desires of my heart.

 

This is not “one thousand” ideas, in fact it is only seven… but used many times over the years, it has to have been close to 1000.